Quote of the day, from NYT:
"Sweden, of course, has a surplus that the deficit-ridden United States can only envy, as well as a knack for staying out of wars that borders on the obscene. It’s that reasonable, semi-socialist, Volvo-driving, super-taxed Nordic place that gave the world Ikea’s cheap furniture and Bergman’s dissection of marriage."
The print version of USA Today sported a review of the latest LoTR game with the headline "Get in a Hobbit".
Apparently I wasn't the only one who enjoyed this, as the online version has been renamed "Middle-earth is worth exploring". For shame, for shame.
A month or so ago I noticed a book in Circe's bookshelf called "The essential Foucault" and I asked, somewhat surprised, why she has a book about a physicist. Great confusion ensued, until it was finally revealed that the Foucault in question was not THE Foucault, merely A Foucault. "THE Foucault" is of course Jean Foucault, the inventor of the Foucault Pendulum, while this particular Foucault was Michael Foucault, some philosopher dude.
In this instance I can understand it, since M. Foucault apparently wrote the book himself, and hell, I'd try to be "THE Gnu" too, if I could. But he's not the only one, apparently, and I don't know if this is a growing trend or I've just started noticing it. It really bugs me when it tricks me into clicking on news headlines - yesterday MSNBC sported the headline "Stewart apologizes for NASCAR remarks", and I thought "Holy fucking pachyderm - what on earth did Jon Stewart do that warrants an apology? I have to read this!" As it turns out, it was not Jon Stewart, it was some NASCAR guy. Now, admittedly, maybe Jon Stewart doesn't have THE Stewart status right now (Martha Stewart? Or is the British royal line still around?), but I do know that it's not some NASCAR guy. And when i click on a link called "Bush drafted", I expect a story on the president being sent off to Iraq, not one about some football player. As must as i dislike the guy, there is only one Bush right now. Not even his father qualifies at this point.
And this goes for music and movies as well. There is only one song called "One", and that is Metallicas. U2's "One" is "U2's One". Sorry, Bono - when a song has been numbero uno on the singles chart for several weeks, the name is taken, no matter how much you want to use it. On the good side, you are definitively "THE Bono". Not that I expect much competition, but still.
So, could we all please be more specific? Or Jesus* will cry.
*Jesus Alejandro, the mariachi player.
I saw '300' yesterday, and the horrid, wooden dialog is still ringing in my ears. SPAAAAAAARTAAAAAAAAAAAA... The desire to desperately search for a mute button faded next to the creepy slaughter of history, however.
Seriously, what kind of jackass sits around, thinking "hmm... 300 men held off an army in the hundreds of thousands, all dying in the end, to protect their home. Possibly the most epic event in human history. But you know what would really make that interesting? Rhinos! Oh, oh, oh! Better yet!!!! MUTANTS!!!!!!"? Yes, the courageous Spartans fight, over the course of the movie, a rhino, a couple of elephants, a chained mutant giant, several hundred Immortals dressed as kabuki players (who turns out to be mutants), and, at the very end, a 7-foot tall Xerxes. Also, while they don't actually fight, Xerxes has a harem of, yes, yes indeed - sexy mutants. Why was any of that necessary?
I'm guessing the same jackass (or jackasses - what does one call a multitude of jackasses? "a frat of jackasses"?) was responsible for Titanic. "hey, we're thinking of making a movie about one of the most moving events in recent history. It has drama, heroism, criminal stupidity, massive hubris, class struggle, simply staggering stoicism. I know what you are thinking - LOVE STORY! Hey, how about including a giant diamond? Oooooooh, I LIKE it!"
Don't get me wrong. I don't mind minor discrepancies. I was even OK with the welsh in "King Arthur" turning into picts, for no apparent reason. But inserting crap just to "make it more interesting", when it is already interesting enough by itself? Jeeeeebus.
At this point, I'm assuming that I can look forward to a remake of Apollo 13 featuring space vampires. "The heat shields are failing!! What the - who brought a fucking bat?! Aaaaaaaargh... "